Saturday, January 7, 2012

My wife and the vacuum cleaner, is it entertaining?

Quite entertaining and amusing. You could tighten the meter by losing a few unnecessay words like "then" in the second verse as well as the second so and Now in the third. I think you get the drift. Do some editing and you have a really, really great poem! It's a fun concept and I hope it's a true experience as well.

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