What's there to live for? What can I do?

So I had an unrealistic dream and gave it up, that was like the only thing that motivated me but now I see the truth, that i can't do it all. I am 18 and I am not going to college1) because I really suck at math,2)I am sick of going to school even if I get good grades in all the other cles,3) don't have the money for it, and I would not apply for a financial aid. I am interested in filmmaking but school is so expensive and I will probably end up broke because it's very hard to get paid as one. I was thinking of going to a vocational college and get a degree but none of the programs really interest me and none pay so much. I just want to spice up my life. It's so boring. What can I do???